Moving On
by Illumini
Summary: For so many years, Shadow has been tormented by the death of his best friend. What happens when hiding his emotions becomes too much? I suck at summaries... SONADOW


It's cold.

Raindrops fall from the sky lightly, a few splashing down onto my quills, causing my ears to twitch. I shiver & pull my onyx jacket tighter around my body, trying to conserve precious body heat as I sit down on a nearby bench. But it's not just the weather that's cold.

It's me, as well.

I'm always cold. Even when the sun is shining, still feel cold. I hate this feeling. It makes me feel isolated from everyone else around me. I see a man & a woman walk past, huddled together, smiling at each other. They're not cold. Across the street, a family passes by, the parents having to physically stop the children from running off everywhere. They couldn't possibly be cold, & dead to the world, like me. But I'm not jealous, because I can't remember what it's like to feel that way. I have been cold my entire life. At least, I have been since Maria died…

//Flashback//

I ran down one of ARK's many corridors, carrying my blue-eyed angel, Maria, in my arms. Earlier that day, a military group called GUN had raided the space station; trying to find something that apparently belonged to them. Not knowing what is was at the point, Maria & I had holed up in a storage room, hoping that the soldiers would find what they were looking for & leave. To my horror, I had found out what their objective was from nearby radio chatter.

They were looking for ME.

I didn't know they wanted me, but judging from the bloody corpses of scientists & technicians strewn throughout the corridors, it couldn't have been good. So we had decided to make a run for it. If we could get to one of the escape capsules, then we could get back to Earth, and hide from them somewhere. According to an evacuation plan on a wall, there was a dock somewhere nearby. Running down the steel corridors & glancing around corners, I saw it. As I bolted down the corridor towards the escape capsule, I held Maria tighter than ever. We were almost there, when I heard a gruff voice behind me.

"Freeze!"

I don't know what possessed me to keep going. Maybe it was how close we were to the capsule, or maybe it was that part of me that knew he wouldn't shoot, if I was so important to them. All I knew was that the next thing I heard was a gunshot. I tensed my whole body, waiting for the pain that never arrived. Instead, I heard a sickening SPLAT & something warm sprayed onto my cheek. I was confused as to its origin, until I felt Maria go limp in my arms. It took me only a second to work out what had happened.

I didn't know whether the soldier had intentionally aimed for Maria, or if he was simply an awful shot, but it didn't matter. Maria was dead, and she was never coming back.

"OK… Now… Get on the ground… And put your arms behind your head…" A voice behind me commanded.

I felt my fist clench up in rage. What was wrong with this man? Did he not feel remorse for his actions? He had just killed a human being, and the only thing he could think of was his job!

"I said get on the ground!" The voice behind me roared again, obvious fear present.

I slowly stood up, and turned to face my friend's killer. I began striding towards him, m fists clenched so tight that my fingernails broke the skin of my palm.

"Command, this is Agent Delta. I need backup NOW! I have a code re-" Those were the last word that came out of his pathetic mouth before I smashed my fist into his jaw. He went flying across the room and smashed into a wall, his jaw hanging at an unusual angle. I walked over to the limp form, grabbed his handgun from its holster & placed it at his temple. I smirked & pulled the trigger, the body jolting violently before going limp. My vendetta complete, I walked over to my dear Maria and stared at her, before breaking down completely.

I was still sobbing when the dead soldier's backup arrived.

//End Flashback//

My daydreaming is interrupted by a painfully familiar cry behind me. I turn around & groan when I see a blue hedgehog heading over towards me, the rain starting to fall heavier. Oh, great.

The Faker.

I growl lightly as he heads over towards me. What does he want NOW. He probably wants to go race, or spar, or something, to try & prove that he's better than me. He'll fail, of course. He'll never beat me. I AM the Ultimate Lifeform.

"Hey Shads!" He says perkily, his lime green jacket waving lightly in the wind. "What's up?"

"Call me that one more time, Faker, and I will dislocate your neck so bad that you'll need a map to find it." I reply, ignoring his question.

"Aw, why do ya have to be like that?" He says, still sporting that cocky grin of his. He shivers & pulls his jacket around his chest. "How are you holding up in this weather?

I shrug in response to the question. "I'm surviving." I decide to cut to the chase. "What do you want?" I say coldly.

"I was just wondering, do you wanna go do something?" He asks.

"Like what…" I growl in response.

"I dunno; go see a movie of something?" He suggests.

I mull over the thought. It isn't one of the worst ideas he's ever had, and at least it'll be a chance to get out of this awful weather. But then again, knowing Sonic, I'll probably get stuck in some G-rated bullshit about sunflowers & elves.

"I guess so…" I mutter my response.

"Awesome! Come on!" He cries happily, grabbing my wrist & dragging me down the street. I pull out of his grasp & glare at him. "I'm perfectly capable of moving myself." I grumble as I turn sharply into the Megaplex. Sonic pauses to stare up at a listings board. "Let's see… Angels & Demons… Milk… Hey let's go see Role Models!" He shouts, pointing up to the screen. I follow his finger. Hmm… It's rated MA, so at least it won't completely suck. I still would rather see something gory, though.

"Fine..." I mutter, following Sonic over to the ticket booth.

//Two hours later//

"Aw man, that was hilarious, wasn't it Shads?" Sonic pants out between laughing.

"It was an immature tit-fest that compromised mainly of dick jokes. And what did I say about calling me Shads!" I smirk to myself. "Although, the camping bit was kinda funny..."

"Yeah..." Sonic yawns quietly. "It's getting pretty late... I might head off home..."

"I'll go with you... My house is in the same direction."

"I didn't know that you moved" Sonic remarks as we start walking.

"Yeah, the old place was getting way too noisy at night... Probably something to do with the new nightclub they opened nearby."

"Huh..." We both walk in silence through the rain for a while, before Sonic comes to a stop.

"Well, this is me..." Sonic says, barely audible over the storm.

"Alright... See ya..." I mutter. Suddenly, something hard hits me on the head. I grab it as it bounces off, and examine it closely. It looks like a small piece of ice, about the size & shape of a golf ball. A few more came tumbling down to the ground.

"Oh shit, HAIL!" Sonic shouts, as he grabs my wrist & pulled me into his house.

It was... small. Much smaller than you'd expect someone like Sonic to own. I walk over to a hook near the door & hang my coat on it, and walk into the living room. There's not much furniture, just a couch, coffee table, TV and a few other bits & pieces scattered around. I walk over to the couch & sit down, allowing the cool chocolate leather to swallow me.

"You want anything to drink?" Sonic asks, suddenly in front of me.

"Yeah, I'll have a black coffee. And none of the decaf shit, either!" For some reason, I feel like I need a strong, hard drink.

"Alright, I'll just be a sec." He says, slipping out into the kitchen. I pick up the remote & begin flicking through the different channels. I growl, it seems that Sonic only has basic cable. I settle on a show called Future Weapons, the title seems promising enough.

"Ready!" Sonic says suddenly, handing me a steaming mug. I take a sip & gasp; I didn't think it would be so hot.

"Hmm?" Sonic mumbles thoughtfully, which was unusual for him, as he turns to look at me.

"It's too hot." I hiss, although it probably sounds more like, 'Is oo ot'.

Sonic chuckles. "That's because it just got made, silly. Here, have some of my cola." He commented, passing me a glass of brown, fizzy liquid. I take a gulp of it & shudder; it's far too sweet for my taste.

"Thanks…" I mumble, handing the glass back.

"No problem." He replied.

We both sat in silence, watching the TV for a while, until one of us said something.

"Why?" I sighed, not turning away from the screen.

"Why what?" Sonic replies, switching his gaze to me.

"Why, why are you always so nice towards me?" I ask him, looking into his deep jade eyes. "All I ever do is give you shit, and yet you still keep at it. Why?"

Sonic frowns, he obviously hadn't been expecting a serious question. He puts a hand on my shoulder. "Because, Shadow." He says with a serious look in his eyes. "Even though you're an acquitted felon & bio-experiment who tried to murder me on multiple occasions, you're still my friend."

I murmur to myself when I hear this. I have been called many things in my life – Shadow, the Ultimate Lifeform, the Project – But rarely have I been called, 'friend'. In fact, the last person who I could remember who had ever thought of me as a friend had been…

Maria…

I look back up to Sonic, & notice that he was waiting for an answer. "Oh. I say simply, turning back to the TV. Sonic stands up, & walks back out to the kitchen. The credits started to roll, so I grab the remote & switch the TV off. I can't stop thinking about what Sonic had said to me. 'I can understand why he such a hero. He's always willing to help someone out, no matter who it is. He's was brave, as well. And modest.' I thought to myself

"Shadow?"

I look up to see Sonic standing in the doorway with a concerned look on his face.

"Tails called. Apparently there's a massive storm cell headed this way. I'm not letting you walk home in that weather. Looks like you're staying here tonight."

"But…" I began to protest, just wanting to get home to my own warm bed.

"No buts." Sonic says firmly, motioning for me to stand up. "I'll show you to your room." He leads me up the stairs & opens a door to his left. "Here you go. The bathroom is just across the hall. If you need anything, my room is just next to it."

"OK…" I yawn; feeling very tired all of a sudden.

"Goodnight, Shadow." Sonic says warmly, as he closed the door.

I lay down on the bed, and slip of my shoes & gloves. The room is very basic, just a chest of drawers, a nightstand, and the bed underneath me. I pull the duvet over me, & snuggle in its inviting warmth, as the spell of the sandman falls over me.

//Dreamscape//

I'm back on the ARK. I'm running down the corridors with Maria in my arms, desperate to find that escape pod. Suddenly, I hear a loud CRACK, and look down, but Maria is no longer in my arms. Instead, Sonic is there, his rich emerald eyes, now dull & lifeless, with a crimson red streak running down the side of his head. My arms grow weak, & he falls to the ground. I reach out to touch him, but I can't, something is dragging my away from him.

"No…" I whisper, struggling faintly against the invisible force. "NO!" I scream as I start thrashing around. "Sonic!"

I can't see him anymore. The darkness is crushing me. "SONIC!" I scream again, tears starting to roll down me cheeks. Suddenly, I hear a voice.

"Shadow." It commands quietly. "Wake up."

//End Dreamscape//

My eyes snap open. I feel cold & clammy, even though I can feel a thin layer of sweat on my brow. "Shadow." The voice says again. I look to my side, and notice that Sonic is kneeling beside the bed, his hands clutching my wrist, his eyes full of worry.

"S-sonic…" I stammer, still unsure of the situation. "Wha…"

"You had a bad dream." He says calmly. "I woke up & heard you shouting my name. I came in here and you were just writhing in bed & crying out."

I sit up straight, trying to remember. Suddenly, everything comes flooding back. I start to shake slightly & curl up defensively, as my eyes begin to glaze over. I try to hold them back, not wanting to be seen as weak. But the feelings are becoming far too overpowering. I'd tried hiding my emotions for far too long. It was like putting air into a balloon. You can keep putting air in, but eventually the pressure's going to become too much and the balloon will burst, & all the air will come pouring out. And that's exactly what happened.

I just totally broke down. All my built up sadness, frustration & regrets starts to flood out. I curl up more, and Sonic starts stroking my quills, trying to calm me down. It feels so undignified – Me, the Ultimate Lifeform, crying & having to be comforted by my archrival. But, at the same time, it feels so liberating.

I kept crying for a while. I eventually begin to calm down, and I feel Sonic clamber behind me, as he starts to massage my shoulders.

"Do you… Want to talk about it? The dream?" He whispers into my ear. I nod sadly.

"Well… I was on the ARK… You were there… And you got shot… And…" I stop talking suddenly; I can feel the tears welling up again.

Sonic murmurs thoughtfully. "You miss her, don't you?" I nod again.

"I understand. My mother died when I was young. I never knew my father." He said solemnly.

I sniffle. "It's just, I felt so awful when she died, that…"

"…You decided never to get close to anyone, in case it happened again?"

"Yeah..." I mumble, amazed at how insightful he could be.

"You shouldn't do that to yourself, Shadow. Maria wouldn't have wanted you to. She would've wanted you to move on, and find someone who loves you as much as she did."

"Really?" I say. I'm still unsure if I can trust what he's saying.

"Of course." Sonic replies, as he stops the rubbing. "Do you want me to go now, so you can go back to sleep?"

"No." I plead, leaning backwards into his lap. "Please don't go." I look at him with pleading, bloodshot eyes.

"OK…" he murmurs, as he spreads his legs on either side of my body & lays back. We both lay there for a while, before he leans over & kisses my head, mumbling "G'night" as he lies back down to sleep. I know I should have felt angry at him for kissing me. But I don't

Because he was right. Maria would have wanted me to move on. To find someone else. Someone else to hold protect, & love. And I have found someone.

Sonic.

My Sonic.


End file.
